Life

So much can be said here. Life is an enigmatic mystery that we are all figuring out together and for ourselves.

It's late so I just will leave you with this:

"In three words I can sum up everything I've learned about life — It goes on." - Robert Frost

Renew in Me

I don't doubt my faith.  But like I have posted recently, I need renewal.  I need my soul and spirit to be refreshed and renewed.  

So I started listening to an album that I probably have not touched in almost 10 years.  I truly would not doubt it has been that long.  And while I am not broken down and in pieces in worship, and not necessarily saying I need to be for a refreshing taste of the Spirit.  But I am touched by not only that I still know each and every worship song word for word, but also that I am able to spend this time for myself getting reacquainted with my faith.

So here is where I feel I am at this moment of my life...in the river, praying for renewal and refreshment:

Find me in the river
Find me on my knees
I've walked against the water
Now I'm waiting if you please

We've longed to see the roses
But never felt the thorns
And bought our pretty crowns
But never paid the price

Find me in the river
Find me there
Find me on my knees with my soul laid bare
Even though you're gone and I'm cracked and dry
Find me in the river, I'm waiting here

Find me in the river
Find me on my knees
I've walked against the water
Now I'm waiting if you please

We didn't count on suffering
We didn't count on pain
But if the blessing's in the valley
Then in the river I will wait

A good visit

To the pediatrician, that is.  We were able to discuss our 5 year old's sensory issues, or Sensory Processing Disorder (see: http://www.sensory-processing-disorder.com/).  He also blew her away with his reading and writing and all around intellectual level.  we discussed that it seems many "high needs" (again see: http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/fussy-baby/high-need-baby/changing-personality-profile-high-need-child-grows) and sensory sensitive children also seem to be the ones who are excelling far beyond their own grade levels (I'm not talking baby geniuses here, but advanced kids nonetheless).  We made a game plan of sticking hard to routine and continuing to work through sensory problems at home, as she doesn't seem him doing well with play therapy because it'll be "beneath" him per se.  So for now, we'll just keep on keeping on with what we are doing and adding in more sensory play throughout our day.  She also got us on a plan to help with the sleep issues for both of the boys.  Crossing my fingers that it helps and we see an improvement there.  I am thoroughly pleased with this doctor and so glad we found her just over a year ago now.  She has been amazing, on the ball, and so informative at every visit.  We are going back in a couple of weeks for the 2 year old well check, too.  I know she'll be just as wonderful then as well.  I am glad we have things set in place now, a diagnosis, and a path set ahead of us for our oldest son.  It feels good hearing someone else also reinforce what we've already been doing.  Its been a pretty darn good day all around.

Immobile

Being a mom of two on the go - go - go boys, it is very hard and very frustrating not being able to get around easily right now.  To add to my foot injury, my knee is now out from being in a bent position so much (from walking with crutches or elevated while sleeping).  Tonight I am in a lot more pain than I was last night.  So much for progress.  Tomorrow I return to work.  I am a bit wary on how this will go, as 99.99% of my day is spent up and walking...usually at a very fast pace.  And carrying items.  All of which I will be incapable of doing while on crutches.  I am hoping that I will be at least on both feet, albeit hobbling probably, by Monday.  This crutches business is for the birds!  I truly don't know how I did this so much as a kid/teenager.  Sheesh.  Of course, I guess I could just use the excuse I was a lot younger and not a parent.  I do know that if this ever happens again, I will be asking for the walking boot or whatever such thing would be available at the time.  I need time off my foot, I know, but now this is just tedious and hard with the boys...making meals, wrangling for bed times or getting out of the house, etc. I need something just a tad easier currently.  Of course, I know this would be different a bit if my husband was able to be home with us.  But then in the end, lets hope I don't do this again.  I really could go the rest of my life without crutches or intense injuries to my feet anymore.  I've had more than my fair share.

Injured

So while out for a walk late Saturday night, I slipped on a rock and injured my foot. After a visit to quick care, at least it wasn't broken...but the sprain is pretty bad. It's put a snag in some plans and other daily activities. I despise crutches and currently that is my mode of transportation. It's tedious, especially as a mom of two boys whose husband is 20 hours away. It's been a long few days...and I know there are several more ahead as well.

Refresh

So while I haven't been to church in quite some time...for many reasons that I do not need to get into on here...I have pulled out some of my worship music and other Christian music cds.  I don't feel all music needs to be Christian music, or anything else in life like that either.  I do feel that we are called to be Christians WITHIN the world around us, not eliminate all things around us to only be Christian and only Christian.  But I digress.  The point is that it really feels like I need to spend sometime on my own spirituality and faith.  I haven't done this is a very long time.  I need the refreshing feeling of this.  I miss singing alone in a room all my own and feeling on a whole different spiritual level, in tune with Yahweh.  I need some time to focus on such things again.  While I've had my reasons, I do feel the need for a renewal, a refresher, of the heart and soul.

"Vacation" is over

We've basically been gone for about a week and a half at my mom's...give or take a day or two. While I know my parents needed the break, today was super crazy having all the kids back together (my nephew and niece plus my two). Space small, too many kids = quick route to headaches. Bed time has been rough tonight, too. Hopefully, we are back in routine FAST. The three of us just function better that way. I barely remember the days of unstructured, no routine days anymore. That all flew out the window with our firstborn who was practically born with a schedule and routine of his own. It's now just a way of life for us. And I actually don't like how it feels without it either...too chaotic and too many tantrums. I prefer the peace that follows after we are in a routine. I guess I need it to thrive as much as they do.

"If Mama's not happy, ain't nobody happy!"

New

New day, new week, new month and new year. Hoping for a great 2012!